I planned to post so many fun things on my blog this week! I wanted to post about prepping for healthy eating at holiday parties, letting Holliday eating be enjoyed on the HolliDAY and not the HolliWEEK, and my plan to work out twice as hard and then thoroughly enjoy some favorite foods on Christmas!
Unfortunately, my week hasn't gone quite as planned. My kiddos had a minor case of a stomach bug this past weekend. On Monday, I woke up with severe stomach pain. I was convinced I had picked up whatever they had been hit with, so I took the day off and planned to rest and hydrate myself right out of it.
By Monday night the pain was unbearable, I had Jason take me in to the ER. We hit them on a busy night, and they offered pain medication and an X-Ray before sending us home 7 hours later with the indication that I was probably just struggling with a stomach virus.
Tuesday I felt a bit better, as long as I didn't eat or drink. I went to work in the afternoon, but was unable to eat anything without immediate, excruciating pain after. I was also still having to take pain medication to function.
Wednesday morning I felt considerably better, I had a Shakeology for breakfast and the discomfort afterward was minimal compared to the last few days. So I ventured out and tried some Quinoa for lunch. Within an hour I was shaking form the severe pain. I headed back to the ER. This time, they did some more thorough blood work and an ultrasound to rule out things like my gallbladder, pancreas and liver. The Doctor determined that I was suffering from a stomach ulcer and prescribed some medication to help.
The medication helped almost immediately, and I was blessed to be able to spend Christmas Eve enjoying my family.
This morning, Christmas morning, I woke up with some fierce nausea and pain in my stomach, though much lower than the ulcer would be. I have also been exhausted, I napped for a total of 7 hours today. I am hopeful that my body is just struggling to adapt to new medications, recovering from a few days of not having solid food while having to utilize pain medication, and healing.
I spent a lot of time being frustrated this week, feeling sorry for myself, and thinking about how unfair all of this was. It's not fair to work so hard at being healthy, just to feel SO unhealthy. It's not fair to work so hard just to have to start over. It's not fair to not be eating solid food while everyone else is enjoying Christmas goodies. It's not fair to not be able to give 100% to my children over the holidays because I have spent so much time in pain.
So I allowed myself the time to feel that, to grieve the loss of what I had PLANNED for this time in my life, and then I forced myself to look outside of my little world. At the people who were spending the Holidays in the hospital, not knowing if they will make it out. At those who are working on Christmas so that the rest of us have access to the services we may need. At all of the people who are not blessed with the many, many, blessings that I have and take for granted.
I feel blessed to have had this setback, because I needed a bit of humbling in my life. Setting goals and working towards them is important in my journey. Being fit is important in my journey. However, appreciating, loving, and being grateful for my body-- no matter what it is capable of-- is crucial to my journey.
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